I feel for you my American cousins; I really do. If this is your chosen reading material, then you may well have heard of far off places outside the Bay Area, like Scotland, Albania, or Tunisia, you may even be able to find such places on a map. You might be capable of conceiving that there are people who have never eaten at KFC’s, girls who have never dreamed of being a cheerleader for their local college team or boys who have no idea what a tailgate is. This article is for you, people.

A recent poll by the American Research Group found that 45% of Americans want President George “Dubya” Bush to face impeachment, and 54% think that Cheney should be kicked out of office. Bruce Fein, the guy who wrote the first article of impeachment for Clinton and a dyed-in-the-wool conservative Republican, is now volunteering to write the articles for Bush and Cheney. Now, you may ask, “In the words of the Virgin Mary: Come again? A Republican conservative calling for the impeachment of the president?” That’s right! In fact, Fein said that Bush’s crimes are much worse than Clinton’s. On a Bill Moyers special in mid July, Mr. Fein said:

“[Bush] is seeking more institutionally to cripple checks and balances and the authority of Congress and the judiciary to superintend his assertions of power. He has claimed the authority to tell Congress they don’t have any right to know what he’s doing with relation to spying on American citizens, using that information in any way that he wants in contradiction to a federal statute called the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act. He’s claimed authority to say he can kidnap people, throw them into dungeons abroad, [and] dump them out into Siberia without any political or legal accountability. These are standards that are totally anathema to a democratic society devoted to the rule of law.”

The Editor went roaring though the Lush For Life offices looking for an unoccupied writer. I panicked. I don’t know why I hide under my desk, because it’s the first place he looks.
“Did you see the Bill Maher stand-up special?” he demanded. “He was saying that Americans believe that we are the ‘best country in the world’ and that’s like guys who think they have the best wife in the world. He asked ‘How would you know?’ Find out whether we are the best country in the world, and if so, how we know this!”

To those of our citizens, and others in the international community who have been assaulted by the hysterical reactions of the leftists to the impending invasion of Canada, I feel an obligation to put things in perspective: a look at the Big Picture.
A little recent American history may help explain why the New World Order is so necessary. Foremost, it is about our nation keeping up with change. It is about the courage of an elected leader who, when he noticed someone had moved his cheese, replied,
“There’s an old saying in Tennessee — I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, ‘Fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can’t get fooled again.’” —George W. Bush, Nashville, Sept. 17, 2002

The Vatican has examined road use and misuse, and found mankind in need of new guidance in this area.
Lush For Life convened a focus group of AAs (Average Americans) to debate the Vatican’s “Guidelines for the Pastoral Care of the Road”, and found that they think the bar has been set a bit high.